There was no one there. But i realized that i need to be a new person. How long must I go letting the decisions of others decide my future or even my present. That’s it isn’t it. In all suicide situations that didn’t include mental disorder like schizophrenia or bi polar or clinical depression…it’s always been some else deciding what you do. Look at the recent bullying suicides. they let people decide for them. They cowarded into their little worlds and ended it all. Not for me. My wife may go and screw whomever she wants but I will not be influenced by her using me any more. I can’t live that way.
I asked Jesus to help me in some way. All He ever asks in return is that I glorify His name. He said I will give you one thing you ask for. I thought about it for a bit and then said “I want a new life.” That’s it, a complete change. And I began experienceing a new attitude almost immediately. I even got two hugs back to back. WW.
Suicide be damned. Not for me. I have too much on the go right now anyways.
Time to check up on the hockey strike.
Good night and thank you.