When one is feeling hopeless one should not blog. But seriously what do we believe? I have half a million stories I could write from this chair but I am in no shape to do so. Religon seems to have failed and I have little faith left. The one pastor I trusted turned out to be a money grubbing control freak. He has what he wanted but few are following him. Art is a real open door even though I am not an artist.

I have lost something. My zeal I think. Some believe I am suffering from a depression of sorts but I think I am losing hope.

I am crying out in the wilderness and hearing no answer. And I am out of bread.

God if you are hearing me please help I am really…..

I think you know the rest. It feels like it’s time for a vacation. The long kind in a rubber room. Maybe with some decent meds. I’ve never been on meds before so perhaps I will enjoy the experience. Or not. I’ve known enough people on meds who keep flushing them just to taste reality. It’s alot like Huxley’s Brave New World, where everyone is dosed on soma (goofballs) and that’s all the escape they need. It sure sounds better than Orwell’s vision.

Okay that’s all for now.



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